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View Full Version : The DAY no one wants to think or talk about!



catstamm
05-10-2006, 10:42 PM
I hate to put a damper on things.....but I heard a story today that broke my heart. When our companions last day comes it will be a day we hoped would never happen, but it willl. We should be prepared....
There is one thing I can't stress enough for everyone to keep in mind when that time comes...
A friend of mine does in-home euthanasia and this is what she tells people.....
"Please do your crying before I get there if you must..... or cry your eyes out when I leave but, make this experience as easy as possible for your dog....it is THEIR time and they need YOU to be strong for them!" You want your dogs passing to be peaceful and loving....not frantic and hysterical.....for all the love, companionship and years of loyalty they gave to you.....this is your day to show them how grateful you are for the years you had together." :angel7:

A Poem...
If it should be that I grow weak
and pain should keep me from my sleep
Then you must do what must be done
For this battle can not be won.
You will be sad, I understand
Don't let your grief then stay your hand.
For this day more than all the rest
Your love for me will stand the test.
We've had so many happy years-
What is to come can hold no fears
You'd not want me to suffer so,
The time has come, so let me go.
Take me where my needs they'll tend
And please stay with me til the end.
Hold me firm and speak to me
Until my eyes no longer see.
I know in time that you will see
The kindness that you did for me.
Although my tail its last has waved
From pain and suffering I've been saved.
Please do not grief - it must be you
Who has this painful thing to do.
We've been so close, we two, these years-
Don't let your heart hold back the tears.

Author Unknown

Otto'sMom
05-10-2006, 11:03 PM
When I had to let Izzy go, I honestly felt myself starting to sink into the depression, thinking how my life without his loving look would be so empty. I forced myself to focus on the really wonderful time he'd had with me and that I'd given him the life he'd only dreamed of before. I shed a few tears and held his paw as he slipped away. Then I cried for days, but felt my heart was healed quicker by that immediate deliberate decision not to think of myself, but to think of his life and how happy he'd made me. I look for his "look" all the time, hoping my little Wartzburg will find a way back to me in this lifetime, even if it's a little selfish to wish that.:hearts:

Alex's Mom
05-11-2006, 07:38 AM
I've been SO lucky so far...all my animals have crossed in "catastrophic" circumstances (horse with broken leg, other horse healthy until died in the night of a heart attack at age of 36; cats hit by car...yes, have learned lesson and any future cats will be INDOOR only!!; and Maxe died of congestive heart failure...no question when day came). I dread the thought that Alex, with all the things wrong with her, will just slowly fade away and I'll be forced to make the "inevitable impossible" decision. When she goes, it will be the first time in almost 30 years that there won't be an animal in the house...I get teary just THINKING about it. I'm also very fortunate in that my vet is also one of my best friends, and she'll come to the house when the time comes. but not for a long time, I hope and pray!!! Good post though Cat, I read the same story you did and was in tears for a long time.

lotsadox
05-11-2006, 09:07 AM
I have been lucky lately to have the dogs I'ves lost pass naturally. One had a heart attack (we think, she always has heart problems), one had spleen and liver problems, one was being 17 and have had a stroke and the resulting problems. It's been 15 years or so since I've had to have one PTS. But I think that what she says is true. When I knew that Pebbles was dying, I ran to get my husband and we sat with her and petted her and told her how much we loved her and she laid her head down and her breathing gradually slowed and she died. That was probably as good as it gets. It was a calm peaceful passing. After she was gone, I cried for an hour and then off and on for the next week. But at the time, I only cried a few tears and let her go. I thought it was the best way.

catstamm
05-11-2006, 09:42 AM
Paula , in response to your comment about a home w/o a dog.
I want to share what I did.....don't know if it works for everyone but, it did for me.
When Hans started really going downhill and I knew in my heart I wouldn't have him much longer. I took him with me to the kennel to be with some of the rescues...he really took a likin to Jen-Jen, so I brought her home hoping it would make him feel better and have a friend to keep his mind occupied...he purked up a little, taught her the rules of the house (or did she teach him LOL) and when Hans time came we were all together....I believe Hans new I wouldn't be alone and he pasted the torch to Jen-Jen. Now Jen and I have a very special bond ...we both knew Hans.....
and actually that's how I started rescue....because of Hans...
http://i58.photobucket.com/albums/g268/catstamm/hanscopy.jpg
http://i58.photobucket.com/albums/g268/catstamm/IMG_1672.jpg
http://i58.photobucket.com/albums/g268/catstamm/IMG_1688.jpg

Alex's Mom
05-11-2006, 09:47 AM
That's a great idea, Cat!!! And super super pics...I love Hans' face...thanks for suggesting it...I certainly know that when Maxe passed, it was a lot easier having Alex here, if for no other reason then I still had to care for her. Didn't stop the tears, but it certainly kept me going, and of course, I tried to only remember the good times because Alex was missing her too and I didn't want to make things worse. However, Alex HATES all other dogs...sadly, she would try to eat, not bond, with another one LOL. I suspect that I'll become a foster home when the time comes, though, so won't be dogless for long, I'm sure. My plan at the moment is to adopt a senior bonded pair (there always seem to be plenty of those around sadly) after she goes. but not, as I say, for a long time yet!

Tex
05-11-2006, 09:48 AM
I....sniff.....can't......(blow nose)......read......anymore. I've really got to stop loggin on at work. People think I've lost it. They would too if they could read what I'm reading.

catstamm
05-11-2006, 10:04 AM
OK....LOL....Hans wasn't the most well balanced doxie either....her hated everyone but me and really didn't care that much about other dogs.....but, there was something about Jen. They never interacted or snuggled together...they just allowed each other to be in thier presence....but, when his time came...she knew it and laid with him for 2 days and that is when I got that great picture! And when he took his last breath Jen laid her head on him tummy...... it was all meant to be and was an incredible experience for all of us. So you never know paula, Alex could surprise you one day....and tolerate another doxie!!!

laura
05-11-2006, 10:13 AM
Geez, I have the tears flowing here too! Harold's age, which is 16, keeps "THE DAY" close in my mind. No matter what anyone says, I am dreading it and I know no amount of intellecualizing or rationalizing it will stop the pain that I know will consume me.

I will never let him suffer, I will make sure that if I have to help him cross, I will do so with ceremony, but I know afterward, his passing is going to be a train wreck in my life regardless.

Laurie' s Dachshunds
05-11-2006, 10:26 AM
Awww! These were so sweet & made me cry too. I had to take my soon-to-be MIL' s Dachshund to the vet to be PTS. She just couldn' t take him in. I am glad I was with him 'cos he loved me. I held him in my arms the whole time & told him to go to the Bridge, show the other pups how to find the bunnies & play with the others.

Rae
05-11-2006, 10:32 AM
I....sniff.....can't......(blow nose)......read......anymore. I've really got to stop loggin on at work. People think I've lost it. They would too if they could read what I'm reading.
:ditto:

um yeah. that was soooo sad.. With Duchie being a mill mamma and all her weird health problems and being of indeterminate age (10 ish? what is ISH?) I try to realize that every day together is a gift for both of us.

That was a lovely poem (Lisa- doesn't it need to be a sticky so it does not get lost?) and I just pray that my girl passes in her sleep, chasing rabbits in her dreams, a long time from now but still in perfect health. (hey, a gal can dream right?)

When I came so close to losing her last year, it really made a difference in our relationship. I think we bonded more closely and that scare made me realize just how much I adore the little pooper-upon-the-carpet.

:hearts:

Bella's Mom
05-11-2006, 01:18 PM
I couldn't help but tear up reading the posts. I can't even think about the sheer possibility of it...